Madame

What a different experience to be addressed as Madame so often these days. In case you didn’t know, Indian culture is generally rather formal and respectful. When I was here before, I was seen generally as a student, but now I am evidently some kind of important person on staff, so many people refer to me as Madame. I probably wouldn’t be surprised except that HMI is on the more informal end of the spectrum here in India. My collegues in the administration call each other by first names (even the director is called Andreas rather than ‘sir’), but the support staff, people from the community, and particularly the computer help guy (I REALLY need to learn his name because we need to become good friends with all the computer issues I seem to have!) call me Madame ALL THE TIME! It is hard to get used to for a typically informal woman like me.

I must tell you that the leadership at HMI is unique in other ways besides some of the informalities. I’ve already mentioned the religious diversity, but today I wish to talk about the role of women at HMI. From the moment I first was introduced to the place, I noticed the significance of women reflected in the staff. Maintenance staff, drivers, and the accounting people are all male, housekeeping staff and most of the cooks are female, but other than that, it is an extremely well balanced place. The director is male, but the next two people in charge are both women. In many areas, women are the ones who hold more power. The most important thing is, so far I have not seen this as a threatening thing to any of the men! It is really wonderful to see. In fact, there is an upcoming international conference about a program that was run here several years ago called Women’s Interfaith Journey. I will tell more about it after it takes place next week, but it is worth noting here that there is a great awareness at HMI that women’s voices and participation in conflict transformation are rarely heard. They want to do something about it – and they are taking action!

Let me tell you a bit more about the programs that are run here now that I am a bit more oriented. I have told a little about the Academic program – my work with about 15 students who study here in 9-12 month programs in addition to the various research scholars, short term learners, and groups which visit anywhere from 2 days to 3 weeks. Their subjects are: Interfaith Relations, Islam, Peace Building, Conflict Transformation, Arabic and Urdu. Most of this is classroom oriented, but the largest group of students is placed in field work sites for 3 months and many of their classes are experiential in nature. This is because they are taught by a team of people from the praxis area of HMI.

The praxis segment is divided into two basic parts: Conflict Transformation (CT) and Community Development (CD). CT runs workshops in some of the most sensitive areas of India (Kashmir, Gujarat, Arnachal Pradesh, Nagaland) and in Sri Lanka. The issues in these regions are political, tribal, religious, and sometimes gender related. Staff members work with groups in the area to host workshops for community leaders or even school children to help them develop skills in addressing conflict in peaceful ways.

Community Development happens here in Hyderabad. After some religious/political (they usually go together) riots in 1990, HMI started 3 projects in the primary areas of conflict – where Hindus and Muslims live in the same community. They bring together women and children from both religious traditions for tailoring classes or schoolwork each day. The primary purpose is to build relationships between them, which will then assist in times of tension. As you have likely seen in various situations, attitudes are changed and stereotypes are reevaluated when you know someone from that group personally (whether it be a racial, religious, sexual orientation, or any other category in which we seem to put one another). So, there are 3 long-term project sites in the city and also various other short term activities or meetings which take place for the same purpose, with various groups, including young men – a group for which is most necessary.

So on top of the role of program coordinator, registrar, recruitment and admissions counselor, faculty secretary, editor, student services point person, and community member, I am eager to learn and be involved in the passionate work for change and peace building around me!

Just on Friday I met with the students, who differ in age, experience, religions, cultures, gender, and it seems like a hundred other things. I had sensed that they are generally in a difficult stage of cultural adjustment, and some of them are starting to show the strain of all the overwhelming stress of adaptation in addition to the end of their term exams and papers. I met with them today to reassure them that it is normal to experience this struggle and how to go about dealing with it in a way that will help them move forward. Sure enough, by the end of our session, the internal relationship issues were being brought up and it seemed to be at least a beginning step to more open communication and understanding. I only can hope that they continue to move ahead in transforming their own issues of conflict as they learn about doing so in their communities!

A word about the photos that you see here: We had two big celebrations this week. The first was a program in the city for Gandhi’s birthday where there was a speech, traditional music, a nice drama/skit by high school students, beautiful traditional dancing (photo), and then a drum and bagpipe group that was fine, but didn’t really fit in. The second was an Iftar meal with the full HMI community (including families). Iftar is the name given to the meal at the end of each day of fasting in the Muslim holy month of Ramadan. Muslims fast from dusk to dawn throughout the month, so most of the students and I chose to fast with them at least this one day to experience the special nature of the iftar meal. That meant that we had our ‘breakfast’ (sahli) at 4:20 am that day as well! It was a good experience. The food that Hyderabadi Muslims enjoy specifically for this holiday is called Haleem. It is lamb that is cooked all day. It looks not so good, but many people LOVE it! (I personally could take it or leave it... it was OK)